Late Night Gags

What could possibly go wrong?

What could possibly go wrong?

Late Show with David Letterman
They’re auctioning off a dinner with Sarah Palin. The starting bids are $25,000. They say now that for an extra thousand dollars she’ll actually shoot the main course

The Jay Leno Show
According to The Wall Street Journal, Walmart will now pay its employees electronically. It’ll still be in pesos . . . but electronically.

The Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien
Everyone watched Jay Leno’s new show at 10. Of course, Jay really did a great job adapting to the 10 o’clock time slot: He told jokes, aired some comedy pieces, then solved a murder and caught a predator

Osama bin Laden has released a new audio recording slamming the president, America, Israel, and the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq. And then at the end when he’s really worked up, he yells, “And Beyonce has one of the best videos of all time!”

Late Night with Jimmy Fallon
Osama bin laden released a new 11-minute tape where he calls President Obama “powerless” in the war in Afghanistan. That was for the first six minutes . . . he gave Taylor Swift the last five to finish her acceptance speech after she was cut off by a rude Kanye West.

According to a new survey of all the social-networking sites, Twitter had the highest percentage of older users. In fairness, most of them just kept creating new accounts because they forgot their passwords.

Twitter also had the highest percentage of users who called their kids and said, “OK I signed up. Now what do I do?”